muse:
the soft, piano and stringed music rolls out of my speakers. a beautiful female voice sings of how math cannot possibly compare with an infinite love, and i find myself agreeing. as her voice vaults higher and higher into the star-laden night sky, the speakers fizz, static is the accompaniment to my whispered singing for a moment. my heart races, the metallic ruby splash comes to life--but only for about a second, merely announcing The Great Coming of Nothing. my heart falls, my face darkens to match the velvet heavens. my downcast stare is met by the blank gaze of my white desk. i ponder a moment before trying to turn my attention back to my book. the words don't leap off the page like they used to. i keep trying to tell myself that i don't need you to top off my night cap, but maybe i do. the static buzz that makes my heart race echoes again, and i glance at my phone. it's...
Showing posts with label human. Show all posts
Showing posts with label human. Show all posts
10.11.2010
10.07.2010
ep:if you snark and muse:record
so, i was considering things to write about for abp#5 and was thinking "douche" and along the lines of that is "let your lab partner collect data all by himself while you go out to lunch and totally don't help him at all." said person that is being addressed doesn't seem to really mind what happened, although i and certain others feel very inflamed and up-in-arms about it. why do people suck, seriously? when people pull their weight, things work. but when they don't people get angry. also, another thing that pisses me off is when people complain, but do not have a solution slash are not planning the stupid thing. homecoming planning for dinner was extremely difficult, people, SO DO NOT SNARK AT ME IF YOU DON'T ENJOY THE RESTAURANT. YOU MAY GO EAT DINNER BY YOURSELF AND THEN COME TO THE DANCE WITH THAT FABULOUS SNARKY ATTITUDE AND THEN DANCE BY YOURSELF IN THE CORNER.
anyway.
a muse. once again inspired by the ending of bones.
muse:
i'd told her that he likes records, especially a certain one by a certain band. the record itself turned different colors when the light hit it at different angles, making for a rather psychedelic effect. i knew he'd love it, but it wasn't my place to give it to him.
that night, we were all sitting around in their comfortably cramped apartment, waiting for him to come home. wine glasses were on the table, and all of us (me, her, and our two friends) were sipping our drinks. white dessert wine, the type that is sweet and then kicks you in the mouth as a reward. the black leather couches were warm and comfortable, and i thought that i could never bring myself to stand up. as the door clicks open, our two friends stand up. they manage to mumble something before pushing their way out the doorway. it's just me, him, and her left. he notices the iridescent record on a table next to the couch.
"what's this?"
"oh, avery told me that you love records. especially this band, and it has your favorite song on it."
she stands up, padding her way over to his side.
"look, it even changes color when you move it around!"
he smiles broadly, winningly. i beam.
"thanks!"
"you're welcome," she and i both answer. they don't seem to hear me, and they kiss simply, but lovingly. i can almost hear my heart shattering on the ground, but this is not my place. i cannot cry here, this is not my place.
"i... i should go. i'll see you tomorrow, glass."
i pick my things up, and i'm almost out the door. his voice grabs my ears, stopping me.
"no, wait, you should stay for dinner."
"yeah," she agrees. "we have enough space for you."
"i'll make that lamb dish i know you like," glass says, his eyes showing something. somehow, i think he's on to me. but that's purely speculation. after all, i just deal with the facts.
"no thanks. you see, normally the first time two people sharing a domicile have dinner together, the person who doesn't live there leaves. so... i'll see you tomorrow."
i turn to face the door, push it open, and brush out without much ceremony. i haven't noticed that devon has followed me until he calls my name.
"avery!"
i whirl around, careful to plaster on an indifferent face.
"yeah?"
he's silent for a moment before mumbling, "see you tomorrow."
i try to smile, i really do, as hard as i can.
"yeah. good night."
as i turn around, i swear he's on to me. he's on to me, but for some reason, the door clicks shut behind me.
anyway.
a muse. once again inspired by the ending of bones.
muse:
i'd told her that he likes records, especially a certain one by a certain band. the record itself turned different colors when the light hit it at different angles, making for a rather psychedelic effect. i knew he'd love it, but it wasn't my place to give it to him.
that night, we were all sitting around in their comfortably cramped apartment, waiting for him to come home. wine glasses were on the table, and all of us (me, her, and our two friends) were sipping our drinks. white dessert wine, the type that is sweet and then kicks you in the mouth as a reward. the black leather couches were warm and comfortable, and i thought that i could never bring myself to stand up. as the door clicks open, our two friends stand up. they manage to mumble something before pushing their way out the doorway. it's just me, him, and her left. he notices the iridescent record on a table next to the couch.
"what's this?"
"oh, avery told me that you love records. especially this band, and it has your favorite song on it."
she stands up, padding her way over to his side.
"look, it even changes color when you move it around!"
he smiles broadly, winningly. i beam.
"thanks!"
"you're welcome," she and i both answer. they don't seem to hear me, and they kiss simply, but lovingly. i can almost hear my heart shattering on the ground, but this is not my place. i cannot cry here, this is not my place.
"i... i should go. i'll see you tomorrow, glass."
i pick my things up, and i'm almost out the door. his voice grabs my ears, stopping me.
"no, wait, you should stay for dinner."
"yeah," she agrees. "we have enough space for you."
"i'll make that lamb dish i know you like," glass says, his eyes showing something. somehow, i think he's on to me. but that's purely speculation. after all, i just deal with the facts.
"no thanks. you see, normally the first time two people sharing a domicile have dinner together, the person who doesn't live there leaves. so... i'll see you tomorrow."
i turn to face the door, push it open, and brush out without much ceremony. i haven't noticed that devon has followed me until he calls my name.
"avery!"
i whirl around, careful to plaster on an indifferent face.
"yeah?"
he's silent for a moment before mumbling, "see you tomorrow."
i try to smile, i really do, as hard as i can.
"yeah. good night."
as i turn around, i swear he's on to me. he's on to me, but for some reason, the door clicks shut behind me.
abp#5: third wheel.
a/n: not sure where this is going to go, but here it goes.
make friends with everyone; keep your feelings hidden 'cuz nobody wants to know; keep a smile perpetually on your face; walk ten feet behind couples; don't ever tell anyone what you're feeling; smile even when i'm not happy?; don't be a cock block; don't tell your best friend that you don't like her boyfriend; don't tell your friend that the real reason why you don't hang out anymore is because of her douche-y boyfriend; what's a cock block?; don't take anything seriously; actually take things seriously but look like you don't; smile at people you like; smile at people you don't like; smile at people you love so much you could cry; smile at people you hate so much you could die; make funny jokes at your own expense; try to never get involved in any drama; get sucked in anyway and find out you like people involved; go home and cry; do i really have to smile at people i hate?; don't ever say how you're feeling 'cuz nobody cares; walk slowly enough that the couples are always at least twenty feet ahead; walk quickly enough so that the one you like who is dating that person you don't like is always at least a hundred feet behind; cry quietly and only at night when no one's around; sing love songs like there's no tomorrow; sing heartbroken songs like there's no today; write sappy poetry about the one you love like there's no yesterday; and when you screw up, blame your sleep schedule.
k, i'd like some feedback, so if everyone who reads could please comment that would be All Sorts of Fabulous.
make friends with everyone; keep your feelings hidden 'cuz nobody wants to know; keep a smile perpetually on your face; walk ten feet behind couples; don't ever tell anyone what you're feeling; smile even when i'm not happy?; don't be a cock block; don't tell your best friend that you don't like her boyfriend; don't tell your friend that the real reason why you don't hang out anymore is because of her douche-y boyfriend; what's a cock block?; don't take anything seriously; actually take things seriously but look like you don't; smile at people you like; smile at people you don't like; smile at people you love so much you could cry; smile at people you hate so much you could die; make funny jokes at your own expense; try to never get involved in any drama; get sucked in anyway and find out you like people involved; go home and cry; do i really have to smile at people i hate?; don't ever say how you're feeling 'cuz nobody cares; walk slowly enough that the couples are always at least twenty feet ahead; walk quickly enough so that the one you like who is dating that person you don't like is always at least a hundred feet behind; cry quietly and only at night when no one's around; sing love songs like there's no tomorrow; sing heartbroken songs like there's no today; write sappy poetry about the one you love like there's no yesterday; and when you screw up, blame your sleep schedule.
k, i'd like some feedback, so if everyone who reads could please comment that would be All Sorts of Fabulous.
10.04.2010
reflections on girl. why is there no boy? muse:human
so, girl. (SO, GURRRRRRRL.)
no, but this was an interesting story. it was from a "teacher" point of view, telling a girl how to be a girl. kinda. which was just hilarious to read because kincaid was constantly like "don't be a slut like i know you wanna be" and i'm just over here laughing my head off. 'scuse me, i'm a boy. write a story for me please? :) in other words, i liked this one.
muse:
as i stare at his retreating figure, i finally feel some trace of regret. but not much, just a sliver. the wind blows my hair, and some strands flow across my eyes. i hate it when that happens. he's finally out of sight, but i think i can still see him from my vantage point up here on this beautiful hill. this beautiful hill that i'm going to hate for the rest of my life, simply because every time i come here, it'll remind me of what happened here. who knows, later, it might make me cry or smile, but for now it makes me angry. and sad. and all sorts of other emotions, but that's for another time. but... to risk my heart and put it on the line. that's not being stupid is it? isn't it just the same as just living, just being human?
no, but this was an interesting story. it was from a "teacher" point of view, telling a girl how to be a girl. kinda. which was just hilarious to read because kincaid was constantly like "don't be a slut like i know you wanna be" and i'm just over here laughing my head off. 'scuse me, i'm a boy. write a story for me please? :) in other words, i liked this one.
muse:
as i stare at his retreating figure, i finally feel some trace of regret. but not much, just a sliver. the wind blows my hair, and some strands flow across my eyes. i hate it when that happens. he's finally out of sight, but i think i can still see him from my vantage point up here on this beautiful hill. this beautiful hill that i'm going to hate for the rest of my life, simply because every time i come here, it'll remind me of what happened here. who knows, later, it might make me cry or smile, but for now it makes me angry. and sad. and all sorts of other emotions, but that's for another time. but... to risk my heart and put it on the line. that's not being stupid is it? isn't it just the same as just living, just being human?
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